Representative of the USA

I re-read a few of my emails from when I lived in Paris in 2004 – just before Bush was re-elected. There were many emails surrounding the topic of Bush, since the French were so adamantly against him being in office, but this entry reminded me of a sort of duty that I, and other expats, have to represent America (if I may be so bold.). (Thank you, Charlie, for keeping them all safe.) I came across this particular entry:

I had a guy at a party Friday night ask me if it was true that Americans thought that we were the only country that existed.  I explained that for many people that is true, that Americans can be very egocentric, etc.  He said that he had a very bad taste in his mouth from Americans because they didn’t seem to know about anything, and that he heard this and that about us, and how can that be possible if we are such a dominant country in the world.

I tried to explain that many Americans have never been outside of the country, but we’re also not as fortunate to have many other countries surrounding us as in Europe.  We continued talking about the differences, and he was a little surprised at my knowledge of his culture and history.  He brought up the fact that Americans helped the French at the end of WWII, and that is a big reason he doesn’t understand our lack of compassion in the world at this point of time.

He asked me why I would want to come to France to study if I was already located in the most powerful country in the world.  I could only say that I didn’t really know, but there was something wonderful I felt when thinking about France and its people, and that’s why I was here to find out why I wanted to be here.

I was very humbled by the way he asked me questions and was really concerned about learning why he would hear such things about Americans.  It just made me think how important it is when going to another country to represent  your country well.  Had I been rude or loud and ignored what he had to say without listening, he would have continued to think that no wonder Americans have the reputation they have.

As the conversation was coming to an end, he looked at me and said…”You have saved a French man from thinking ill of your country.  I will now think differently about Americans.”  I felt at the time like I was in some amazing back to school special on different cultures mingling.

I ask myself this often. Do I have a duty to represent our country well, or is that too big of a task to put on myself? In the end, people are going to think what they think about me, and perhaps I can only be the best person I can be. That bodes the same for living life even if I were in the USA, doesn’t it?

Making Friends Abroad

As I have such close friends back home, being away from them is always hard. I did it once in Paris, but again, I was with other Americans who I didn’t have to try that hard with. Being in England, though seemingly easy, was quite tough at first to feel like I fit in. I do tend to blurt out random abrupt direct things at the most inopportune times, and that can be a turn off. Plus, if you’re in your home country, it can be weird to be friends with a foreigner, and honestly, I don’t blame people for not wanting to try to befriend me. We all remember the foreign kid at school. Well, that’s me!

Plus, I think I’m actually a natural loner.

Others might disagree, but I think, naturally, I am. I make a real effort to be outgoing. I think if I just let myself go, I could easily be in the corner most of the time watching others interact with others. Also, if I let myself think too long and hard about meeting new people, going out with big groups or being the center of attention, I get panicky. So, I make myself not think about it and push through…after all, that’s what you gotta do in life. Push through the things that scare you the most, right?

Mostly all the jobs I have ever had has meant me being alone for the better part of the day. And even as I get older, again, I’m straying away from acting and feeling more comfortable with being alone on my laptop writing about characters.

So, why am I writing about being a friendless old outcast?

Well, I was recently asked to guest blog on the illustrious Melissa’s Smitten by Britain blog, and we came up with a post about how I started a ladies group in England as a foreigner. I was a member of one in Los Angeles, and found it to be one of the most fulfilling things I did whilst I was there.

So, if you’re like me – a lonely miserable expat who is in dire need of friends (just kidding!), then start your own group! I swear there is nothing like getting together with a group of women to lift your spirits. These women have become true friends, and I’m so happy they agreed to come hang out every month. I didn’t even have to pay them!

READ MY GUEST BLOG POST HERE!